h o m e

Ten top talents for mindful leadership presence

2010-09-26T10:07:00.001-07:00

What defines mindful and resonant leadership? In this article, we look at those qualities which include simplicity, poise, respect, courage, and confidence. >>

Thriving in the Moment

2010-04-30T09:40:00.000-07:00

Stress is certainly an indication that you are having some kind of a problem with this moment. You are stressed because there is disharmony between you and what is happening—things are just not how you want them to be. >>

The Five P's of Purpose

2010-04-30T09:24:00.000-07:00

We are born to dream. Think about it. Where would we be, who would we be, without our dreams? Most of the great inventions of the world, much of the forward movement of human civilization, have been fueled by dreams. So it should come as no surprise that for many of us, finding purpose means putting our dreams into action. >>

Bow Ties with Tomatoes, Feta, and Balsamic Dressing

2010-04-30T09:01:00.002-07:00

This recipe features a surprise ingredient–green grapes–that add the just-right amount of sweetness to the simple, two-step pasta dinner. Serve with pan-grilled asparagus. >>

Prep Time: 20 minutes
Yield: 4 servings (serving size: 2 cups)

Today's Small Change: AIM for Success

2010-04-30T08:51:00.002-07:00

Set Smart Short-term & Long-term Goals

As you work your way through the Healthy Living program, you probably have a long-term goal or two in mind. Whether these goals consist of losing weight, improving your fitness level, or finding balance in your daily life (or all of the above!), it's great to know what kind of "big picture" you're aiming for. But it's also important to set smaller, short-term goals that you can strive for and achieve along the way. Accomplishing these smaller goals will help you feel rewarded for your efforts, and it can help you stay motivated over the long haul. >>

Keep Your Head in the Clouds & Your Feet On the Ground

2010-04-30T08:41:00.002-07:00

A few weeks ago while I was on a run, the saying "keep your head in the clouds and your feet on the ground" popped into my head. I'm not sure why I thought of this, but once I did I couldn't get it out of my mind. And while I've heard this saying many times (and actually have always thought it was pretty corny and cheesy), I started to think about it more deeply and realized the true wisdom of this idea. >>

The Power of Desire Without Attachment

2010-04-15T09:42:00.000-07:00

The more passionate, bold, clear, and free we become with our desires - knowing them, feeling them, seeing them, and expressing them - the more likely we are to not only manifest them specifically into our lives, but to live with an authentic sense of passion, purpose, and power.

Here are a few things you can think about and do to expand your capacity for passionate desire, without attachment... >>

Intimate Relationship as a Spiritual Crucible

2010-03-25T09:27:00.000-07:00

Living with someone we love, with all the joys and challenges, is one of the best ways to grow spiritually. But real awakening only happens, says renowned psychologist John Welwood, in the charnel ground where we acknowledge and work with our wounds, fears, and illusions. >>

RAIN for Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction

2010-03-25T09:07:00.000-07:00

Here is a practice excerpted from A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook to help you gain control of situations and reduce stress. >>

Top 10 Salads for Spring

2010-03-22T11:00:00.000-07:00

Try these delicious and healthy Spring salads from Eating Well >>

The Power of No

2010-03-22T10:50:00.000-07:00

How do you feel about saying "no?" I notice that saying "no" to certain people and in some situations can be challenging for me. What is it about saying "no" that many of us have a hard time with? >>

Pasta with Zucchini and Toasted Almonds

2010-03-19T20:02:00.000-07:00

Pair flavorful pasta with olive tapenade breadsticks for a superfast and delicious meal in minutes. Fresh with hints of spring! >>

How to Open Yourself to Your Life's Purpose

2010-03-16T12:36:00.000-07:00

In A New Earth, Eckhart Tolle writes that to awaken to your life's purpose, you have be ready for a change in the state of your consciousness. But how do you know when that time comes? And where can you even begin?

The one big question most of us ask ourselves is "What should I do with my life?" For most people, it's very difficult to answer. Use these simple suggestions from people who have successfully answered this question and are now living the lives of their dreams. Be inspired to pursue your dreams and discover the impact you are meant to have on the world! >>

Herbed Stuffed Chicken Breasts

2010-03-12T07:57:00.005-07:00

Dish up a company-worthy dish that calls for only four ingredients, plus salt and pepper. Choose roasted asparagus as a bright, fresh partner for this main dish. >>

How to Read Food Labels

2010-03-12T07:53:00.000-07:00

Grocery shopping can be daunting! Walk down the aisle and you'll see a slew of food labels that claim healthy this and nutritious that. Never before have food packages displayed so many health claims in the U.S., according to a recent commentary in the Journal of the American Medical Association. >>

What Do-Gooding Does for Your Brain

2010-03-12T07:38:00.002-07:00

Are you a do-gooder? If you are, chances are you'll stay sharp as a tack as you age. >>

Avoid These Pitfalls To Live the Life You Want

2010-03-10T11:02:00.000-07:00

Have you ever wondered why your life didn’t turn out exactly the way you wanted it to be? Gilbert Ross focuses on things to avoid in order to empower us to live our best lives. >>

How to Do Hard Things

2010-03-10T08:24:00.001-07:00

One of the harsh little realities of pursuing a dream is that sooner or later, you’re going to have to do some stuff you don’t like very much. It’s just plain inevitable. Enter procrastination. Dread. Meltdown. Complete inertia. >>

12 Inspiring Quotes from Thich Nhat Hanh

2010-03-10T01:06:00.001-07:00

~ "Freedom is not given to us by anyone; we have to cultivate it ourselves. It is a daily practice. No one can prevent you from being aware of each step you take or each breath in and breath out." ~

Here, Thich Nhat Hanh shares a few words of wisdom >>

Have Your Blueberries This Way -- It's Better

2010-03-10T00:39:00.000-07:00

Get more nutrition from your blueberries by tossing them into a steamy bowl of oatmeal instead of cold cereal and milk. Make sure that you're getting the benefits of these delicious antioxidants. >>

The Hidden Wiring of the Best Leaders

2010-03-09T23:54:00.000-07:00

Real leaders have trained their brains to focus on the possibilities and opportunities available with military-like focus. They block out the noise of the doomsayers and shut out the voices of their critics. They get that their mindset and their personal energy are two of their most valuable resources. So they protect them well. >>

Get Energized

2010-03-08T22:57:00.000-07:00

Enhancing energy is at the heart of every yoga practice—it's designed to release energy blockages and optimize the healthy flow of life force (prana) throughout the body. >>

Who Do You Think You Are?

2010-03-07T22:05:00.000-07:00

Drop the self judgment and authentically pursue your dreams. Your true life is waiting for you! >>
1) Notice when your feelings of not good enough or unworthy show up
2) Ask yourself more deeply, Who do you think you are?
3) Upgrade your story about yourself

30 Minutes to a Better Mind

2010-03-07T21:47:00.000-07:00

You can boost the mind-protective HDL in your bloodstream just by doing this for 30 minutes a day: walking. >>

Spring Meyer Lemon Olive Oil Cake

2010-03-07T20:15:00.000-07:00

This zesty little treat is just the perfect thing to make you start thinking of those sunny spring days only a few weeks away! Enjoy! >>

Fight Alzheimer’s By Finding Purpose

2010-03-07T19:46:00.003-07:00

Finding purpose in life is its own reward, no doubt. But, it may also help ward off Alzheimer's disease and mild cognitive impairment >>

Green Cosmetics

2010-03-04T22:20:00.000-07:00

You shouldn't need a chemistry degree to figure out what's inside a bar of soap. That's what Deborah Burnes explains. >>

Toaster Special - Roast Chicken With Olive Relish

2010-03-04T22:08:00.001-07:00

Check out what an elegant and healthy meal can be made in your toaster! Pamper yourself or someone you care about with this tasty selection. >>

Look On The Bright Side

2010-03-03T02:53:00.003-07:00

Look On the Bright Side. It's often said and often brushed off as almost too common a suggestion. Yet, I invite you to explore the meaning of those words and realize there's a lot of depth there. >>

Accept Resistance

2010-03-02T14:14:00.000-07:00

Don't be afraid to meet resistance in meditation. Make the commitment to sit and meditate regularly. A willingness to stay present with the resistance that surfaces during mediation will help you cope with those complex emotions that continually arise in daily life. >>

Tex-Mex Calzones

2010-03-02T14:03:00.002-07:00

Spice up sandwich night with this Tex-Mex inspired favorite packed with ground turkey, fresh veggies, and spicy salsa. >>

Blissful Vacation Pointers

2010-03-02T13:58:00.001-07:00

When you prepare for your vacation, Yoga Journal recommends you pack these tried-and-true natural remedies and avoid common travel maladies. Have a great trip! >>

Senior Fitness: The Secret to Healthy Aging

2010-03-02T13:41:00.001-07:00

EL PASO, Texas -- You may be over 50, but that doesn't mean that you can't be as healthy as you were at 20. There are millions of seniors across America who have embraced senior exercise and achieved a level of senior fitness that we've never seen in previous generations. These inspiring people can teach us all a thing or two about healthy aging. >>

Quick Low Calorie Eating Well Dinners

2010-03-02T13:35:00.000-07:00

Are you ready for spring? We sure are! Rejuvenate your dinner plate with delicious, light low-calorie dinners that highlight spring fruits and vegetables, like rhubarb, spinach and more. Bonus: These healthy recipes are all ready in 30 minutes or less. >>

5 Tips For Shopping Organic On A Budget

2010-02-28T13:10:00.000-07:00

Looking to be mindful of your nutrition and your costs at the same time? Read this article about ways to do both! >>

Living A Strong Life

2010-02-28T12:58:00.000-07:00

To get you started on your path to living your strongest life, Oprah.com features Marcus Buckingham's eight-step Strong Life Plan to help you build both your career and personal life. Get the steps to give you that Strong foundation. >>

4 Ways to Walk (Mindfully) into Mental Health

2010-02-25T00:28:00.001-07:00

During the day many of us are moving so fast, sometimes physically, but almost always mentally. Our neurons are firing in hyper speed with so much to do and so much to pay attention to. I’ll often catch myself walking so fast to my car, head tilted forward, and eyes darting to the handle of the door where my next action will be. Sometimes, when I remember my practice, I notice that I’m “rushing home to relax.” In that moment I become present and realize that I don’t have to rush home to relax, I have arrived in the present moment and can choose to “be” different. Here is a way we can apply this to something many of us do every day…walking. >>

The Magic of the Olympics

2010-02-24T00:30:00.000-07:00

There’s something truly magical that happens during the Olympics. While many of us are enjoying rooting for our country and we’ve seen some remarkable performances in Vancouver from people like Lindsey Vonn, Shaun White, Evan Lysacek, Bode Miller, and many others – the real magic of the Olympics is way bigger than any individual athlete or even any country. And, if we look deeper, there are so many aspects of the Olympics that can teach us, remind us, and inspire us on our own personal journey. Mike Robbins highlights important elements and lessons of the Olympics>>

Happiness Is An Inside Job

2010-02-24T00:08:00.000-07:00

Happiness Is an Inside Job: Practicing for a Joyful Life
By Sylvia Boorstein Ph.D.

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How can we stay engaged with life day after day? How can we continue to love–keep our minds in a happy mood–when life is complex and often challenging? These are questions that Sylvia Boorstein addresses inHappiness Is an Inside Job. In more than three decades of practice and teaching she has discovered that the secret to happiness lies in actively cultivating our connections with the world, with friends, family, colleagues–even those we may not know well. She shows us how mindfulness, concentration, and effort–three elements of the Buddhist path to wisdom–can lead us away from anger, anxiety, and confusion, and into calmness, clarity, and the joy of living in the present.

Simple 30-Minute Soups

2010-02-24T00:03:00.000-07:00

Few things are as satisfying as a bowl of hot soup on a cold winter night. Just add a salad and a hunk of your favorite whole-grain bread and a healthy dinner is served!

Here are 6 of our favorite soup recipes from Eating Well — all ready in 30 minutes or less.

2010-02-23T23:58:00.001-07:00

Click here to register!

21 best crops for your edible garden

2010-02-23T17:34:00.000-07:00

Leaf lettuce

All leaf lettuces (ones that grow in loose rosettes rather than heads) are great in salads, but ‘Oak Leaf’, ‘Red Deer Tongue’, and ‘Red Sails’ are especially pretty when tossed together. Fresh cut as baby greens, they’re sweet and tender.

Plant in sun; part shade in hottest climates; all climate zones.

Find out what other crops Sunset recommends for creating an edible green garden and tasty summer!

Stress Reduction Powerful Enough for the US Military

2010-02-22T23:18:00.002-07:00

By Gretchen Reynolds

A new approach to stress is bringing relief to U.S. soldiers—and shedding light on how we should all deal with life's obstacles.

Karen Reivich, Ph.D., sometimes finds herself awake at 3 a.m. filled with worry. But unlike most people, Reivich, a research associate in the Positive Psychology Center at the University of Pennsylvania and codirector of the Penn Resiliency Project, has learned how to shake off anxiety when it rears its frenetic head.

In fact, Reivich is so good at beating back angst that she and her staff were recently contracted to develop a curriculum for the U.S. Army to teach soldiers practical skills for becoming more resilient to stresses of military service. The rest of us, she believes, could benefit from similar resources. Here, her tips for handling whatever comes your way.

2010-02-20T05:56:00.001-07:00

Peace Is Every Step: The Path of Mindfulness in Everyday Life
By Thich Nhat Hanh

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Feng Shui Your Bedroom

2010-02-20T05:48:00.000-07:00

If insomnia is a problem, don't overlook the décor of your bedroom. Ideally, your bedroom should be restful and not used for anything but sex and sleep. Banish all paperwork and the television to other rooms, keeping clutter to a minimum. Get the sleep of your dreams with these simple feng shui tips for your bedroom.

Lemony Shrimp and White Bean Salad

2010-02-20T05:44:00.000-07:00

Refrigerate the salad and the dressing up to one day in advance; toss together just before serving. Try the Real Simple recipe!

Thich Nhat Hanh on The Practice of Mindfulness

2010-02-20T05:13:00.002-07:00

“Breathing in, I know that I am breathing in.” It is such a simple practice, but it can transform your life. The great meditation master Thich Nhat Hanh teaches five mindfulness exercises to help you live with happiness and joy.

Plan Your Ideal Walking Workout

2010-02-19T09:57:00.000-07:00

Make every step count, no matter how often you hit the pavement. Sarah Bowen Shea offers great tips on how to make the most of your morning walk. Besides being great for the heart, a walking meditation can also be great for the mind. Check out some other suggestions.

The Wonder Vitamin You’re Not Getting Enough Of

2010-02-19T02:56:00.002-07:00

You drink fortified milk. You walk outside for 30 minutes a day. And you take a multivitamin. So you've got vitamin D covered, right?

Not if you're like 40 to 85 percent of North Americans. And if you're over 60, have dark skin, or slather on sunscreen every time you step outside, put yourself in the 85 percent zone. That's bad news for your health. Not just because you need D to build strong bones, but because a steady stream of recent research suggests this familiar nutrient is responsible for more good deeds than a string of superheroes put together—including the biggie that it can even help you live longer. >>>

Gentle Nighttime Routine

2010-02-17T23:55:00.001-07:00

Whether it's breathing to slow the heart rate or massage to calm the mind, a simple yogic routine can be effective for a better night's sleep.

- Know your timing
- Create a wind-down period
- Strike a pose.
- Get warm

The next time you have trouble sleeping, follow these simple steps, and observe their soothing wonders.

Lamb Chops With Cauliflower and Raisins

2010-02-17T23:47:00.001-07:00

Try Real Simple's one pot recipe for an elegant healthy meal in 20 minutes.

Secrets of Motivated People

2010-02-17T23:39:00.000-07:00

by Lesley Alderman

New year, new you. It’s the perennial January catchphrase that holds such conquer-the-world promise. And then, well, you get sidetracked with conquering your to-do list. But even the loftiest resolutions (running a marathon, writing a book) don’t have to fall by the wayside come February. Staying motivated―and achieving what you set out to do on that bright New Year’s Day―is surprisingly possible. Just follow these nine mantras, provided by researchers who study motivation and backed up by women who have used them to realize their biggest ambitions. Get inspired!

The Business of Relationships

2010-02-17T23:04:00.001-07:00

by Robin Sharma
Included in the Top 10 Best Companies to Work For (Fortune Magazine), not surprising we see Google, Edward Jones and Dreamworks. When employees were asked why they love (yes love) working for the top contenders, they didn't mention the pay, the expense accounts or advancing to the top title in the Googleplex. They spoke first of the kindness of relationships. These passionate workers described their work culture as an extension of home, or like being with family. They spoke enthusiastically of their colleagues as being fun and supportive. Managers of the Best Companies are characterized as genuinely caring; every single employee truly matters. Work for these fortunate employees is like a favorite gathering place - a place to play at their top level with like minded talent.

These testimonials reveal that business is nothing more than a human venture built on high caliber relationships. Without deep relationships, leadership doesn't work. The old model of leadership - which puts profit above people - is dead. Learn what isn't and Robin's prescription for effective relationships and improved business results.

Travel Therapy Good for the Soul

2010-02-17T12:27:00.001-07:00

Travel is good for the soul. It expands our horizons and puts our lives in perspective. This guide offers a variety of escapes for every occasion -- from adventure to soul searching to healing. Travel Therapy is bound to stir the wanderlust in you! Grab a copy and get inspired!

Travel Therapy: Where Do You Need to Go?
By Karen Schaler

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Mindful Dinners in Less Time Than Pizza Delivery

2010-02-16T14:48:00.000-07:00

When you’re busy (and who isn’t?), reaching for the phone to order takeout can seem like an easy solution. But in the same amount of time, you can save money and have a healthier meal when you make one of these delicious 20-minute dinner recipes from Eating Well. Try recipes like Green Pizza, BBQ Chicken Burritos, Sesame Noodles, Marmalade Chicken, Mustard-Crusted Salmon, Quick Spinach & Tomato Pasta

Ethics for the New Millenium

2010-02-15T16:28:00.000-07:00

The Dalai Lama Foundation has introduced a working guide entitled Ethics for the New Millennium. It presents a moral framework based on universal rather than religious principles. It rests on the observation that those whose conduct is ethically positive are happier and more satisfied and the belief that much of the unhappiness we humans endure is actually of our own making. Its ultimate goal is happiness for every individual, irrespective of religious belief. The guide offers helpful benchmarks for goals we can set as individuals and corporations. Download the guide now

The Meaning of the Dalai Lama for Today

2010-02-15T16:14:00.000-07:00

It is not merely that the Dalai Lama represents “Buddhism,” thought to be a distinct “religious system.” He is much more than a nominal leader of an organization. He does not seek to convert anyone to “Buddhism.” “Buddhism” is not a world organization, competing with other organized world religions, seeking strength in numbers. It is an age-old movement seeking to educate the heart and mind of any being for freedom and happiness, no matter what their ideology. It is a teaching of the reality of selflessness and relationality. The Dalai Lama is a simple monk, an adept mind scientist, a thorough scholar, a spiritual teacher, a diplomat, a Nobel Peace Prize Laureate, an apostle of nonviolence, an advocate of intelligence and universal responsibility, and the living exemplar of what he calls "our common human religion of kindness." Robert Thurman explores the modern relevance of the Dalai Lama and his message.

Grilled Chicken with Mustard-Tarragon Sauce

2010-02-15T10:59:00.003-07:00

Mindful eating is essential to your health. Preparing your own food allows you to be mindful about exactly what you put into your body. Check out this new chicken recipe - a tangy sauce enlivens simple grilled chicken breasts; a hint of sugar balances the flavors. Try it tonight!

How to Build Intimacy From Mars and Venus

2010-02-15T10:46:00.001-07:00

By Helen Fisher, PhD, Oprah.com
What is intimacy to you?" Recently, I asked this of a man I've been seeing. He replied, "Doing things together." I knew what he meant.

Most of us have a primal craving to be truly known by someone before we die, to build a deeply committed relationship based on honesty, trust, self-disclosure, respect, appreciation, interdependence, and togetherness. But the sexes often define intimacy differently. When women want to draw closer, we face each other, lock eyes in what has been called the "anchoring gaze," and proceed to reveal our hopes, our worries, our lives. To women, intimacy is talking face-to-face—a behavior that probably evolved millions of years ago when ancestral females spent their days holding their infants up in front of them, soothing them with words.

Men, however, often regard intimacy as working or playing side-by-side. Sure, they might discuss a bad week at work, even troubles in their love lives. But rarely do they share their secret dreams and darkest fears. More>>

Spotlight on Viniyoga

2010-02-15T10:40:00.000-07:00

As we travel through life, it's no mystery that we are constantly evolving on all levels: physically, emotionally, and intellectually. So why not tailor a yoga routine that will help address and integrate these transitions? Viniyoga is an empowering and transformative practice designed to do just that.

How to do Mindfulness Meditation

2010-02-15T01:16:00.000-07:00

“Mindfulness practice is simple and completely feasible. Just by sitting and doing nothing, we are doing a tremendous amount.”

In mindfulness, or shamatha, meditation, we are trying to achieve a mind that is stable and calm. What we begin to discover is that this calmness or harmony is a natural aspect of the mind. Through mindfulness practice we are just developing and strengthening it, and eventually we are able to remain peacefully in our mind without struggling. Our mind naturally feels content.

Read more from the Shambhala Sun article about:

Creating a Favorable Environment

Beginning the Practice

Posture

Gaze

Breath

Thoughts

Accepting Personal Responsibility

2010-02-15T01:04:00.000-07:00

Accepting personal responsibility is the first step in really taking control of your life. While it's important to understand the past, acknowledge any injustice there, release shameful feelings -- it's even more important to release it and move on. This is your survivor moment in which you become your own hero. That's where the personal responsibility comes into play. You have a choice of how you live your life. We become mindfully aware of the options that exist in every encounter and become the leader of our own ship.

Lance Armstrong's Live Strong site had a really good overview on Personal Responsibility and I invite you to make these values your priorities. More >>

Design Minded Hotels Lead

2010-02-14T00:59:00.003-07:00

Expand your horizons and launch your adventures with Design Hotels™, a unique international travel company synonymous with distinctive architecture and interior design, balanced with functionality and exceptional service. What more could we want?

Does It Have to Be Work?

2010-02-13T23:49:00.001-07:00

There are times when we do love without working so damn hard—when we love a child or a friend or an aunt or a dog or a painting or a tree or the stars—and we can draw on those experiences, I think, to love someone, or fall back in love, before both parties achieve perfect and mutual sanity. Our feelings for our beloved will always be deeper than our feelings for an aunt or a tree (although not necessarily for a dog), and they will always be more complicated, but by recalling what simple, pure, joyous love is actually like, it may be possible to reproduce it under more challenging circumstances. Love was once associated with joy, fun and happiness, and it would be nice if it were so again.

Read the article by James Collins, contributor for O, The Oprah Magazine

Authentic Love

2010-02-13T23:34:00.000-07:00

“Love is always bestowed as a gift―freely, willingly, and without expectation. We don’t love to be loved; we love to love.”

― Leo F. Buscaglia

Spotlight on Jivamukti Yoga

2010-02-13T22:57:00.000-07:00

Looking for a highly meditative but physically challenging form of yoga? Try Jivamukti. You won't be alone.

Each week, more than 2,000 people visit the Jivamukti Yoga Center in New York City. Its popularity lies in the teaching approach of cofounders David Life and Sharon Gannon, who opened their first studio in 1986, combining an Ashtanga background with a variety of ancient and modern spiritual teachings.

Valentine's Day Chocolate Gift Ideas

2010-02-13T20:54:00.001-07:00

Our friends at Seduction Meals announce their fav sexy chocolate gifts just in time for Valentine's Day. Don't let your lover find you empty handed. True chocoholics understand that one truffle, one flavor, one tiny box, is never enough. Check out Terry's favorites -- all gracious gifts for your loved one on Valentine's Day.

How to Be Your Love's Biggest Fan & Best Critic

2010-02-13T19:10:00.003-07:00

Learning how to simultaneously show love and offer constructive criticism is crucial to developing and maintaining a healthy and authentic relationship. Personal growth expert Mike Robbins offers tips on how to successfully achieve both. Find out how to balance the equation in connect.

Mindful Living Joins Facebook

2010-02-13T10:16:00.002-07:00

Become a fan of Mindful Living Online on Facebook and connect with other mindful people.
1 heart+1mind=ignition

Distilling the Soul of A Nation

2010-02-12T23:53:00.004-07:00

$30 million dollars and a dream backed by NBC and the Olympic Committee brought color and light to my television screen tonight culminating in the opening ceremony of the 2010 Vancouver Winter Olympics. I imagined all that went into producing such a spectacle and the pressure to distill a whole nation’s culture into an evening of premium prime-time television. Producer David Atkins had his work cut out for him as he and his team assessed an inventory of symbols, stories, messages, and themes. The goal was to communicate the new face of Canada which combines progress and reverence for the past. A particular highlight was poet Shane Koyczan’s We Are More.

(excerpted)

we are young

we are cultures strung together

then woven into a tapestry

and the design

is what makes us more

than the sum total of our history

we are an experiment going right for a change

(we are more - full version>>)

MLO sends condolences to the family of Nodar Kumaritashvili of Georgia.

Let Your Passion Cook

2010-02-12T19:28:00.002-07:00

Mindful cooking is not detached or subdued, says Edward Espe Brown. It’s cooking with your whole being engaged—mind, body, and emotions. A cook’s temperament is a passion for life. Learn to let your passion cook. More>>

Toward a Mindful Society

2010-02-12T16:52:00.002-07:00

As creator of Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction, Jon Kabat-Zinn has brought the benefits of mindfulness to many and inspired a movement that is changing our society in many ways.
"It’s moving into programs on childbirth and parenting, education, business, athletics and professional sports, the legal profession, criminal justice, even politics." Read the article>>

Parents, Being Ordinary is Special

2010-02-12T15:33:00.002-07:00

Today’s parents offer too much approval and enthusiasm for simply their children’s existence, disrupting kids’ growing abilities to accept realistically both their strengths and their weaknesses, which is the true foundation of self-esteem. Dr. Young-Eisendrath sees the solution in a return to being “ordinary,” as this is rooted in “wisdom about our human condition and a knowledge of how we are all connected.” Parents, avoid what Young-Eisendrath calls The Self Esteem Trap to raise well balanced kids. More>>>

What Is Love?

2010-02-12T14:54:00.002-07:00

Love

Is deserving

And gracious

It is the essence of the heart’s shape

Ebullient and elated

Joyful and caring

Love

Provides space to access your highest self

Support to achieve your dreams

Even, the drive to attain them

It is freeing, giving and caring

Love is motivation

Love

Is an anchor

Truthful, reliable and forgiving

It is reason when the world seems awry

Steady balance and dependable guide

Love is acceptance

Love

Is peace of mind and passion

It is wise and knowing

Confident and comfortable

Love is nurturing

Love

Is not obsessive, stifling or selfish

It cannot be tamed or controlled

Love is abundant and unlimited

Love is a gift

And must be appreciated

It is the reason the sun set appears extra special

An explanation of that radiant glow at breakfast

Why you enjoy going that inexplicable extra mile

Love is fairy dust rounding magical moments

Love is the bond between you and I

We all need to grow and give

It is our unique and sublime purpose

Love propels our dreams and desires

Love evolves over time

Enriching our lives in immeasurable ways

Love is all that matters

Live, Give, Love

8 Ways to Eco Chic Your Computer

2010-02-12T00:14:00.002-07:00

from Natural Health

Choose a laptop - it uses a quarter of the power of a desktop.
Shut down your computer every night—you’ll save an average of $90 a year.
Check out the new EcoFont which looks super cool and cuts down on ink usage by up to 20 percent. Download it for free here

numbers 4-8>>

10 Ways to Find Happiness

2010-02-11T23:11:00.001-07:00

Happiness is life's most cherished goal. On every continent, in every country and in every culture, when people are asked, "What do you want?" the most popular answer is "happiness." When parents are asked, "What do you most want for your children?" the answer is "happiness." Happiness is the goal that makes other life goals—like success, prosperity and relationships—feel meaningful and enjoyable. 10 Ways...

8 Guilt-Free Chocolate Desserts

2010-02-11T22:21:00.002-07:00

Chocolate and Valentine’s Day are a perfect pair. Even better, these chocolate desserts taste sinfully decadent, but are low in calories so you can indulge without worrying about your diet. (Plus, chocolate may benefit your heart’s health.) So if you love chocolate as much as we do, try these Dark Fudgy Brownies and 7 other delicious diet-friendly chocolate desserts. More...

No Valentine? No Problem!

2010-02-11T09:34:00.004-07:00

Valentine's Day is a great time to evaluate where you're at and appreciate who you are. Here are some ideas from Dr. Laura Berman for those celebrating this year sans partner. Make it a great day!

1. Celebrate your independence. I know it's hard to imagine, but someday you will look back with fondness on the days when you were accountable to no one but yourself. Enjoy this time — that you can sleep until whenever you want, withwhom you want (well, pretty much), and eat breakfast at 2 p.m. on the couch in your pajamas!

2. Pamper yourself. Give a little loving attention to your body and mind, instead of waiting for someone else to do it. Take a sensual bath with lavender oil, lots of candles, and your favorite music in the background. Order your favorite take-out, get a great movie and treat yourself luxuriously.

3. Take charge. If you've had your eye on someone, or you've been engaging in some heavy yet indirect flirtation, make the move. Think about when you are old and gray one day, regretting all the things you didn't do when you were young and attractive! If you are too scared to do it in person, send an email or a text message. That way the ball is in his court if he wants to respond.

4. Send flowers to yourself. I'm telling you, it works! Flowers are beautiful and can make you feel happy every time you look at them. Spend the money you would spend on a valentine on a beautiful arrangement for yourself.

5. Go to the bookstore. Yes, the bookstore is the new singles bar. With all that great literature, you have endless subject for conversation. Or, hit the magazine section if that's more your style.

6. Get fluent in body language. Learning how to use your eyes, body and posture helps you with that all-important nonverbal communication with lovelies who catch your eye. Be a master at flirting without saying a word.

7. Babysit a friend's kids. It's good karma to allow two others a shot at Valentine's Day bliss. Plus, a night with the kids just might restore a sense of appreciation for the single life!

8. Make a cake from scratch — frosting and all. It's fun to create something from start to finish and then you get to eat it. If you choose chocolate, you just may feel the same endorphins that those in love do.

9. Broaden your sense of love. From your family to your friends to your lovers of times past, focus on how lucky you are for all of the love in your life.

10. And if all else fails, go out! Brave the couples walking arm-in-arm down the street and the guys peddling roses. Tomorrow will be just another day in that couple's relationship and the roses will be half-off. Find a bar or restaurant to enjoy yourself at with the girls, or just by yourself. You never know who might have the same idea up his sleeve.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Real Aphrodisiacs to Boost Desire

2010-02-11T09:20:00.000-07:00

By Helen Fisher, PhD O, The Oprah Magazine

Forget oysters and chocolate. The most powerful aphrodisiacs are already inside our bodies.

Mankind has searched for aphrodisiacs for centuries. The ancient Romans slurped down oysters, the Chinese swore by shark fin soup, and the Arabs were keen on camel's hump. But the most powerful aphrodisiacs are already inside our bodies. Humans have evolved three different brain systems to encourage mating: sex drive (lust), feelings of attachment (trust), and romance (being in love). Each of these systems plays a role in desire, and scientists are now beginning to pinpoint the bodily chemicals that trigger each.

Lust: Sex drive is associated with a class of hormones called androgens, particularly testosterone (yes, women produce it, too). Today women with low libido can get a prescription for testosterone, even though it's FDA approved only for use in men. But women can also increase their levels without medication. Playing competitive sports has been shown to trigger testosterone production; in fact, women get a bigger boost than men prior to a competition. Making love can also create the same effect. Studies have suggested that sex raises testosterone levels, so the more sex you have, the more sex you desire.

Trust: Feelings of trust and attachment are fostered by the chemical oxytocin. In a study conducted at the University of Zurich, couples who used a nasal spray containing oxytocin before discussing an ongoing marital conflict were more likely to engage in friendly, positive communication than those who didn't take a whiff. You can stimulate oxytocin naturally with touch. Hold hands while you watch TV, trade massages, or sleep in each other's arms.

Love: The third chemical that drives relationships is dopamine, a key player in the brain's pleasure center that's been found to promote romantic love. Research shows that novelty—taking risks or trying something new—can trigger the release of dopamine in the brain. I'm not just talking about novelty in the bedroom (although that would be a good start). You can get the same effect from sampling a new type of cuisine together or riding the roller coaster at an amusement park.

The afterglow: Scientists may be figuring out how brain chemistry influences emotion, but don't expect to see a real love potion anytime soon. That's because you and I are more than just chemicals. We're thinking beings with a host of experiences, values, ideas, and memories—all of which share the stage with the chemical systems for lust, attachment, and romance. No product will ever trick you into loving someone you really don't like. But if you've already found the right person and want to give your relationship a kick, before you brew up a batch of camel's hump soup, you might give my less-exotic aphrodisiacs a try. Take the test at whyhimwhyher.com

The Best Dark Chocolates for Valentine's Day

2010-02-10T15:31:00.000-07:00

by Gabrielle Frank When eaten in moderation, antioxidant-rich dark chocolate boasts countless health benefits, a perfect gift for Valentine's Day. Check out a few of our favorite dark chocolate delights at MORE!

Put Love First

2010-02-10T02:04:00.003-07:00

If you put love first, you can make your relationship everything you need it to be. See if you are really putting love first by answering these questions:

How are you communicating?
Are you actively listening and responding to each other's needs and desires?
Are you connected?
Are life's demands distracting you from one another and ruining your intimacy and romance?

Take a minute to remember the love that brought you together in the first place and reset to reconnect with those feelings. Make sure your partner knows how much your relationship means to you. Make it your priority to put love first this week. And, if your partner commits to doing the same thing, your relationship will thrive! Dr. Laura Berman

Keep in mind that romance is an important element. Your partner might consider romance as the true measure of his or her value to your relationship. Be thoughtful and try doing something sweet for no apparent reason.

Love Ourselves, and the Rest Will Follow

2010-02-10T00:52:00.000-07:00

How do you feel about self love? More importantly, how well do you love yourself? For most of us, loving ourselves is something we may know is important (yet at the same time think is arrogant or narcissistic), but often have difficulty actually feeling, expressing, and embodying.

As we lead up to Valentine’s Day this weekend and think about the important people in our lives whom we love (or the fact that we wish we had more love in our lives, especially right now), much of our focus tends to be outward and not inward.

The ultimate goal of being ourselves in an authentic way is actually about loving ourselves in a generous way. If we truly love ourselves, most of what we worry about and even much of what we strive for in life (and even in our relationships) becomes meaningless. We may still have some worries, and we’ll definitely continue to have dreams and desires. However, from a place of true self love, the fear behind our worries and the motivation for our desires dramatically changes from something we have to avoid or produce in order to be accepted and valued, to something we we’re genuinely concerned about or really want to experience.

On the flip side, if we don’t love ourselves, nothing much really matters. No matter what we create or experience we’re never able to appreciate it, ourselves, or to be fulfilled in the process, because we’re constantly striving to be validated in an insatiable way.
Self love is what we’re all searching for. Sadly, we spend most of our lives thinking that someone or something else can give us what only we can give ourselves. To be truly fulfilled in life and relationships, we have to find the love within us and give it to ourselves. No other person, material possession, or accomplishment can do it. It’s up to us.

Especially when it comes to relationships, self love is essential. One of the best gifts we can give to the people around us is to love ourselves in a genuine way. As my mom used to say to me when I was young, “You can’t love anyone else, until you love yourself.”

Read the rest of Mike Robbins article.
For this week’s audio message, click here.

Taste For Life

2010-02-10T00:03:00.001-07:00

According to Ayurveda, a healthful diet should include all six tastes. Gupta took this insight about rasa and applied it to the emotional resonances in music, dance, and drama—and, by extension, to life. He identified nine emotional rasas, or moods.

Erotic the flavor of love
Comic the flavor of laughter
Pathetic the flavor of sorrow
Furious the flavor of anger
Heroic the flavor of courageous ardor
Terrible the flavor of being scared
Odious the flavor of being repulsed
Marvelous the flavor of amazement
Peaceful the flavor of serenity

The Soulmate Secret

2010-02-09T21:29:00.001-07:00

Loving yourself is important but connecting with another meaningful partner in crime, sorrow, glee has it's merits as well.

I've recently come across Arielle Ford's The Soulmate Secret which offers an insightful take on ways to clear the path to let love find you.

The Soulmate Secret
By Arielle Ford

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Is it your dream to find a life-partner who will love, cherish and adore you? The Soulmate Secret: Manifest the Love of Your Life with the Law of Attraction will show you how to take control of your romantic destiny.

Taking Care of Our Hearts

2010-02-08T00:11:00.006-07:00

Helpful Tips and Information for Healthy Living from the American Heart Association.

Better lifestyle habits can help you reduce your risk for heart attack. Learn what you can do to help prevent heart disease and stroke.

At the Heart of Health is Good Nutrition
Good nutrition is essential for your family's heart health. Browse the American Heart Association's Nutrition Center and start making small changes in your diet. Before you know it, you'll be on the road to healthier hearts and longer lives! more

Managing Your Weight We can help you manage your lifestyle to better manage your weight and reduce your risk for heart attack. more

Exercise & Fitness Swimming, cycling, jogging, skiing, dancing, walking and dozens of other activities can help your heart. Whether it is included in a structured exercise program or just part of your daily routine, all physical activity adds up to a healthier heart. more

Kids and a Healthy Lifestyle The American Heart Association is working to raise public awareness about the serious threat posed by childhood obesity. Learn more about the various ways on how you can become involved in improving children's health. more

It's Not Just a Man's Disease Heart disease is far and away the leading cause of death of American women, but you can do a lot to help protect yourself and women from it. Read this section for some important advice. more

Heart Healthy Recipes This Valentine's Day

2010-02-07T19:04:00.003-07:00

Check out Mindful Living's Nourish for the best heart healthy recipes to serve your sweetie this Valentine's Day. Of course, dinner must be accompanied by a few sweets for your sweetheart. Fear not, chocolate will make an appearance!

Bon Ap!

Valentine's Day For Everyone

2010-02-07T18:53:00.007-07:00

With Valentine's Day just a week away, let's reflect on the abundance and love that's already in our lives. Instead of pining away for Mr. Right, let us show love and appreciation for the network of friends, the pet, the doorman who smiles. All of these little things add up to a life more loved. As we appreciate all of these things, we invite more in.

This year, let's also commit to finding ways to nurture and love ourselves more. As we do, we become stronger and more captivating to friends and partners. So put yourself first. You are at least half of any relationship you're in.

Over the next few days, please check for posts to make your Valentine's Day more enriched. Share your love and abundance with a friend! A good way to share your love, is to let friends know about Mindful Living!

...Another is to donate to the American Heart Association. :)

Become Ignited & Recapture Your Joy

2010-02-06T22:23:00.003-07:00

I was in Las Vegas this week - a place where people come to express joy, have a good time. However, so many people I encountered appeared to be unignited - almost as if they were just going through the motions of their lives hoping that winning $25 at a slot machine will put a skip in their step. I notice this in other cities, but it seems most ironic in Las Vegas, America's playground. Are people here really happy or are they chasing a high?

Why are people what I am calling unignited? I believe this happens when people lack connectedness, awareness, mindfulness, appreciation. Mindfulness practice enables us to live more vibrantly, creates balance and true satisfaction. It doesn't require us to seek artificial highs but enables us to appreciate the $25 win with perspective.

Most of my idea of awareness was already imprinted in me but my practice now solidifies and elevates these ideas. What I'm saying is, you know most of this already and practicing with discipline will ignite you. Here are some tools to get you started.

Be a big picture thinker. Close in on your personal big picture
Focus on a few core priorities. Stick to those. Everything else is negotiable
Appreciation is key. Don't take people/things for granted. Express gratitude every day
Every interaction is an opportunity
Adversity teaches a lesson
Empathy is important. Put yourself in another's shoes
Remember that we all share certain common goals
Remove clutter from your life. Anything that doesn't contribute to your personal big picture is dispensable
Slow down. Much of the racing is busy-ness
Be your own priority. You being your best you allows you to be more present for others. Be kind to yourself
Listen to yourself, your gut feelings and respect them
Master your emotions. Don't be reactive. In each situation, think be goal-oriented and think of how you can be most effective
Think of ways to test your boundaries and invite new experiences. Try to progress your goals each day
Importantly, keep yourself balanced. Everything in moderation can be healthy. Too much of anything can be detrimental.

I'm a student like all of us. I can't say that I perfectly accomplish all of this each day, but I do make them priorities and notice tremendous progress in all areas of my life week by week. Mindfulness is accessible and should be introduced in a way that is comfortable for you. Sprinkling a little more into your daily routine will bring increased joy and connection for you. You will begin to feel happier, more relaxed and understood. Things will naturally begin to flow and feel right. You will be living in full color. By inviting more mindfulness into your life, you will bring joy to even the most mundane routine. At last, you will be ignited! Welcome!

Debra Riggs is the editor of Mindful Living Online (mindfullivingonline.com) and founder of MN8 Media, LLC. Please feel free to contact Debra at debra@mn8media.com.

DBT Training: Interpersonal Effectiveness Overview

2010-02-06T11:36:00.002-07:00

In this and following sessions we will be covering skills for enhancing the following types of effectiveness.

Objectives Effectiveness Skills (using skills to get what you want)
Relationship Effectiveness Skills (using skills to maintain/improve a relationship)
Self Respect Effectiveness Skills (using skills to maintain your self-respect)

These skills can help you:
- Take care of your relationships

- Balance priorities (your needs) with other's demands (other's needs)

- Balance wants (things that you want to do) with shoulds (things you ought to do)

- Build mastery and self respect

Objectives Effectiveness, Goals

- Getting what you want , getting your wishes taken seriously

- Standing up for your rights in such a way that they are taken seriously

- Requesting others to do things in such a way that they do it

- Refusing unwanted or unreasonable requests and making the refusal stick

- Resolving interpersonal conflict

- Getting your opinion/point of view taken seriously

It is important to remember that no one is able to get everything they want from others all of the time. Some environments are "similarly impervious" to even the most skilled individuals. Increased interpersonal skills will increase your probability of getting your objectives met. In situations where it is impossible to get what you want, distress tolerance and radical acceptance become important interpersonal skills.

Relationship Effectiveness, Goals The art of maintaining or even improving an interpersonal relationship while you try to get what you want. When this works well, you will get what you want, and the person may like or respect you even more than before.

- Acting in a way that makes the other person want to give you what you are asking for

- Acting in a way that makes the other person feel good about your saying no to their request

- Balancing immediate (short-term) goals with what is good for the relationship

Sometimes your main goal is to get the other person to approve of you more, stop criticizing or rejecting you, stay with you. In this case relationship effectiveness refers to choosing a way to do this (improve the relationship) that does not do damage to the relationship in the long term. It is also important to remember that you have to balance relationship goals with the other two type of goals.

A: Relationship begins > person sacrifices needs and wants to keep the relationship > frustration and unmet needs, huge inequities > relationship ends: big fight, partner walks out or you leave the relationship in frustration

B: Relationship begins > difficult situations dealt with > unmet needs assessed > inequity assessed > big issue addressed

Self-Respect Effectiveness, Goals Self-respect effectiveness involves maintaining or improving your good feeling about yourself and respecting your own values or beliefs, while you try to get what you want. It includes: acting in ways that fit your sense of morality and acting in ways that make you feel competent. Personally, I think this is the most consistently important form of personal effectiveness.

Things that diminish self-respect over the long term:

- Giving in for the sake of approval

- Lying to please others

- Acting helpless (also diminishes your sense of mastery)

We Don't Solve Our Problems, We Outgrow Them

2010-02-02T11:35:00.002-07:00

I was recently reminded of a great quote from psychologist Carl Jung, he said, We don t solve our problems, we outgrow them. As I've been thinking about this the past few days, I realize how often my attention is actually on solving my problems, not outgrowing them. No wonder the ones I obsess about the most seem to linger. However, we ve all experienced this outgrowing process many times. Think back to some of the biggest problems in your life when you were a child or an adolescent (or even just a few years or months ago) that are no longer issues for you anymore. In most cases, you simply outgrew these things.

How can we make this awareness process more conscious and deliberate, and not simply happen by accident? It's important that we shift our focus, as Jung reminds us, from solving to growing. As we try to solve the biggest problems in our lives related to relationships, career, health, effectiveness, money, awareness, and more maybe we can stop trying so hard to fix these things and look more deeply at the feedback we're getting and where we can enhance our own growth.

Here are a few things we can think about as we look to deepen our growth and shift away from the obsessive problem solving mode many of us find ourselves in:

1) Confront your biggest problems. Tell the truth about the biggest issues in your life and look at what you ve been doing to either avoid or solve them neither of which will ultimately give you what you want.

2) Look for the growth opportunity. With authenticity and compassion, see if you can look beneath your avoidance or even your intended solutions, and find the beautiful feedback life is giving you right now about where you can grow.

3) Reach out for support. Getting support, feedback, and guidance is an essential aspect of our life and growth, especially when we want to change, transform, and grow into new and deeper places. When we re looking at outgrowing some of the most challenging aspects of our life and transcending certain "problems" (some of which we may have been dealing with for quite some time), it's fundamentally important we reach out for help from people in our lives friends, family members, co-workers, counselors, coaches, teachers, and others.

As we do these three things, with a sense of kindness and appreciation towards ourselves, we can expand our growth, which will ultimately lead us to where we want to be in our lives. Remember, there is no specific destination we're after in this process growth is really about deepening our experience of life and enhancing our capacity for joy, fulfillment, and love.

(For this week s audio message, click here.)

Awake, Aware, and Alert

2010-02-01T00:25:00.000-07:00

Three Steps In the Process of Living a Life of Gratefulness by Bro. David Steindl-Rast O.S.B.

"There are times, I must admit, when stopping at night to review my day seems to be the first stop on an express train. Then I look back and realize with regret how much I missed."

An act of gratitude is a living whole. To superimpose on its organic flow a mental grid like a series of "steps" will always be somewhat arbitrary. And yet, for the sake of practice, such a delineation can be helpful.

In any process, we can distinguish a beginning, a middle, and an end. We may use this basic three-step grid for the practice of gratitude: What happens at the start, in the middle, and at the end, when we experience gratitude? What fails to happen when we are not grateful?
Before going to bed, I glance back over the day and ask myself: Did I stop and allow myself to be surprised? Or, did I trudge on in a daze?
To be awake, aware, and alert are the beginning, middle, and end of gratitude. This gives us the clue to what the three basic steps of practicing gratitude must be.

Step One: Wake Up
To begin with, we never start to be grateful unless we wake up. Wake up to what? To surprise. As long as nothing surprises us, we walk through life in a daze. We need to practice waking up to surprise. I suggest using this simple question as a kind of alarm clock: "Isn't this surprising?" "Yes, indeed!" will be the correct answer, no matter when and where and under what circumstances you ask this question. After all, isn't it surprising that there is anything at all, rather than nothing? Ask yourself at least twice a day, "Isn't this surprising?" and you will soon be more awake to the surprising world in which we live.
Surprise may provide a jolt, enough to wake us up and to stop taking everything for granted. But we may not at all like that surprise. "How can I be grateful for something like this?" we may howl in the midst of a sudden calamity. And why? Because we are not aware of the real gift in this given situation: opportunity.

Step Two: Be Aware of Opportunities
There is a simple question that helps me to practice the second step of gratitude: "What's my opportunity here?" You will find that most of the time, the opportunity that a given moment offers you is an opportunity to enjoy--to enjoy sounds, smells, tastes, texture, colors, and, with still deeper joy, friendliness, kindness, patience, faithfulness, honesty, and all those gifts that soften the soil of our heart like warm spring rain. The more we practice awareness of the countless opportunities to simply enjoy, the easier it becomes to recognize difficult or painful experiences as opportunities, as gifts.

But while awareness of opportunities inherent in life events and circumstances is the core of gratefulness, awareness alone is not enough. What good is it to be aware of an opportunity, unless we avail ourselves of it? How grateful we are shows itself by the alertness with which we respond to the opportunity.

Step Three: Respond Alertly
Once we are in practice for being awake to surprise and being aware of the opportunity at hand, we will spontaneously be alert in our response, especially when we are offered an opportunity to enjoy something. When a sudden rain shower is no longer just an inconvenience but a surprise gift, you will spontaneously rise to the opportunity for enjoyment. You will enjoy it as much as you did in your kindergarten days, even if you are no longer trying to catch raindrops in your wide-open mouth. Only when the opportunity demands more from you than spontaneous enjoyment will you have to give yourself a bit of an extra push as part of Step Three.

The Review Process It helps me to review my own practice of gratefulness by applying to these three basic steps the rule I learned as a boy for crossing an intersection: "Stop, look, go." Before going to bed, I glance back over the day and ask myself: Did I stop and allow myself to be surprised? Or did I trudge on in a daze? Was I too busy to wake up to surprise? And once I stopped, did I look for the opportunity of that moment? Or did I allow the circumstances to distract me from the gift within the gift? (This tends to happen when the gift's wrappings are not attractive.) And finally, was I alert enough to go after it, to avail myself fully of the opportunity offered to me?

There are times, I must admit, when stopping at night to review my day seems to be the first stop on an express train. Then I look back and realize with regret how much I missed. Not only was I less grateful on those non-stop days, I was less alive, somehow numb. Other days may be just as busy, but I do remember to stop; on those days, I even accomplish more because stopping breaks up the routine. But unless I also look, the stopping alone will not make my day a truly happy one; what difference does it make that I am not on an express train but on a local if I'm not aware of the scenery outside the windows? On some days, I even find in my nightly review that I stopped and I looked, but not with alertness. Just yesterday, I found a huge moth on the sidewalk; I did stop long enough to put it in a safe spot on the lawn, just a foot away, but I didn't crouch down to spend time with this marvelous creature. Only faintly did I remember, at night, those iridescent eyes on the grayish brown wings. My day was diminished by this failure to stay long enough with this surprise gift to deeply look at it and to savor its beauty gratefully.
My simple recipe for a joyful day is this: Stop and wake up; look and be aware of what you see; then go on with all the alertness you can muster for the opportunity the moment offers. Looking back in the evening, on a day on which I made these three steps over and over, is like looking at an apple orchard heavy with fruit.

This recipe for grateful living sounds simple--because it is. But simple does not mean easy. Some of the simplest things are difficult because we have lost our childlike simplicity and have not yet found our mature one. Growth in gratitude is growth in maturity. Growth, of course, is an organic process. And so we come back to what I said at the beginning: To superimpose on the organic flow of gratitude a mental grid like a series of "steps" will remain arbitrary. When I am grateful, I am neither rushing nor slouching through my day--I'm dancing. What is true in dance class is true here too: Only when you forget to think of your steps, do you truly dance.

Create a "What I Enjoy" List

2010-01-29T07:47:00.000-07:00

"As simple as this may sound, it is very important for you to make one. This list should include everything that brings you pleasure and passion in life. If you aren't sure what brings you joy right now, think back to what used to bring you joy. This may require some exploration, but what did you do when you were a little kid that brought a smile on your face? Did you used to go horseback riding? Walk outside in a garden? Whatever it may be, write it down. This list doesn't mean that you have to do them every day. It's just to make you aware that there are things in the world that do make you feel alive. If you are able to do something you enjoy at least once a week, do it and help yourself feel alive in that moment. You have to behave the way you want to feel before you feel the way you are behaving! It's about opening yourself up to a new experience or something that you stopped doing. Try to rediscover what it feels like to look or feel differently from the 'not enoughness' you have been putting into your head for a long time now. When you start doing this, you will launch yourself back into aliveness!"

— Dr. Robin Smith

DBT 11: Opposite to Emotion Action

2010-01-29T01:31:00.004-07:00

Opposite to Emotion Action is another technique for changing negative emotions. The idea behind this technique is that it can help to deal with distressing emotions by setting into motion an action that is helpful, not harmful. Doing this counteracts the suffering you might otherwise feel because of the distressing emotion.

For example, if we are angry, there are many actions that we might take to express our angry feelings. But if the action that we take is one that is opposite to the emotion we feel, like walking away from a situation when we are angry, or distracting ourselves with something nice, then we have put our energy into something that is eventually going to make us feel better. In this way, we not only reversed our action (walked away instead of yelling at someone), but we also began to make a change in our angry feelings. We didn't escalate or heighten our feelings, but did something that made the feelings decrease, by putting something positive in their place.

It's important to know that this skill is not about trying to suppress our emotions. We are using that angry feeling to take a different action. The result of this will be a gradual change in our emotions. It can be appropriate to use this technique when emotion mind is winning. Your emotions may be out of proportion, or escalating, or be emotions that we want to challenge or change.

For example, if we are feeling very depressed and low and like no one wants us around and we might as well just stay in bed, a way to act opposite to the emotions is to get ourselves up and do something (go for a walk, go to the grocery store, visit a friend, etc.). We are not denying our emotion, but we are challenging it by acting opposite to it. Instead of staying at home in bed, we are getting up and going out. We may not see big changes, but little by little we will notice changes in the way we feel.

Examples:

FEAR

· Do what you are afraid of doing....OVER AND OVER AND OVER.

· Approach events, places, tasks, activities, people you are afraid of

· Do things to give yourself a sense of CONTROL and MASTERY

· When overwhelmed, make a list of small steps or tasks you can do

· DO the first thing on the list

GUILT OR SHAME

· When guilt or shame is JUSTIFIED (emotion FITS your wise mind values)

· Repair the transgression

· Apologize

· Make things better, do something nice for person you offended (or someone else if that is not possible)

· Commit to avoiding that mistake in the future

· Accept the consciences gracefully, then let it go

SADNESS OR DEPRESSION

Get active, approach, don't avoid

Do things that make you feel competent and self-confident

ANGER

Gently avoid the person you are angry with rather than attacking them (Avoid thinking about him or her rather than ruminating)

Do something nice rather than mean or attacking

Imagine sympathy and empathy for other person rather than blame

Forget About Creating a New You: Just Be Yourself

2010-01-28T08:39:00.002-07:00

There's lots of focus on the annual "new year, new you" phenomenon in the advertising, media and self-help worlds. And while this time of year can be a great catalyst for positive change in your life, what if you made a commitment to live your life in 2010 focused on who you are, and not so much on what you do, what you've accomplished, what you look like, what you're striving for and more? One of best things you can do in this new year is to focus on who you really are, instead of who you think you're supposed to be.

Who would you be without your accomplishments (or failures), your degrees (or lack thereof), your bank accounts, your experiences, your title, your home, your status? As simple a concept as this is to think about and discuss, at least on the surface, it's actually quite difficult for many people—myself included—to genuinely separate who they are from what they do (or have done or not done). This past year has shown, in some cases quite painfully, how quickly the external circumstances of your life can change and things can be taken away.

The deeper question to ponder here is really one of the big philosophical questions of life, "What makes you a valuable person?" While this is something everyone has thought about to some degree, most people don't really engage in this inquiry on a regular basis. And, when you do, you often think that if you just got more done, lost some weight, made more money, took a vacation, accomplished a goal, had more meaningful work, made it to retirement or whatever, then you'd be happier or feel more valuable. Sadly, this is not usually the case and is why most of your New Year's resolutions don't really last.

What if, in addition to having resolutions, you could expand your capacity for appreciating yourself for who you really are in a genuine way, having nothing to do with your external self? What if just being yourself, the way you are right now, is good enough?

Being yourself takes courage, commitment and faith. It's a process of letting go of many false beliefs you've picked up from the collective consciousness: that you have to look good, be smart, know the right people, say the right things, have the proper experience, in order to be happy and successful in life. Being yourself can be scary and counterintuitive, difficult and even off-putting and, at times, lonely. However, being your authentic self is liberating, exciting and fulfilling. When you have the courage to just be who you are, without apology or pretense, so much of the suffering, stress and worry in life simply disappears.

3 ways to truly be yourself

Live Your Passion

2010-01-28T08:36:00.003-07:00

There are no big secrets to making your dreams come true and doing what you're passionate about. But there are three ingredients found in every dream realized. They are:

The belief in yourself and in your dream
A heaping dose of passion and imagination
A lot of hard work

Take the following steps toward pursuing what your are passionate about:

Robin Sharma Advice for Fearless Living

2010-01-28T00:47:00.001-07:00

1. You don't grow in normal, All I mean by this is that if you stay within your comfort zone, you don't grow. But if you instead stretch and face fear head on by going to your limits, you'll discover your limits will grow.

2. You don't know until you try. It would have been easy to refuse the chance to heli-ski. I could have made a thousand excuses. But Leaders Without a Title recognize good opportunities. So i seized it. And because I tried heli-skiing, I not only grew as a skier, I added another experience to my life that will shape all I do.

3. On the other side of your fears you'll find your confidence. By doing what we're afraid to do because it's beyond our comfort zone, we grow in confidence. The increased confidence I have as a skier because I skied a new peak will translate to increased confidence as an entrepreneur and as a human being.

4. Life's short so get int he game. A rich life is one made up of many rich adventures. Don't miss out on enjoying as many as you can.

It’s Not the Circumstances, It’s Us - Mike Robbins

2010-01-27T15:07:00.006-07:00

I recently read a great quote from Ben Franklin that I hadn’t seen before. He said, “Joy doesn’t exist in the world, it exists in us.” While the quote was new to me, the concept wasn’t. However, as I began to think it more, I realized that even though I “understand” this wisdom and do my best to live by it and remind others of it, more often than I’d like to admit, I find myself living as though I’m simply a victim of the “things” that go on around me and in the world – especially the stuff I don’t particularly like, agree with, understand, feel like I’m on top of, or enjoy.

The circumstances of our lives, especially when they seem stressful or intense (as is the case for many people I know and work with these days) do have an impact on us, for sure. However, all too often we give away our power to these circumstances and situations. We act as though it’s a foregone conclusion that we will feel a certain way based on specific circumstances (i.e. the economy, the weather, our health, our level of activity, the state of our romantic relationship or lack thereof, the behavior of our children, our families, the state of our career or business, our environment at work, and more).

Our experience of life (grateful, worried, peaceful, angry, excited, sad, alive, depressed, joyous, or anything else) is much more of a reflection of us and what’s going on within us, not a reaction to what’s going on around us. We’ve all had many examples of times in our lives when things were going “great” on the surface or we accomplished or experienced some “wonderful” external success, only to feel a sense of disappointment or sadness underneath because whatever it was didn’t satisfy us at a deep level. And, on the flip side, most of us have had moments of incredible joy, excitement, and bliss that weren’t directly connected to anything “worthy” of these feelings externally.

Even though we know this dynamic to be true, we still seem to get caught in the hypnotic, erroneous notion that if we just got rid of some issues, altered some circumstances, manifested some increased success, or changed some specific situations in our lives – then, we’d be happy, peaceful, and relaxed (or whatever it is we say we want to experience).

Author and teacher Byron Katie says, “The definition of insanity is thinking that you need something you don’t have. The mere fact that you exist right now without that which you think you need is proof that you don’t need it.”
What if we lived our lives with a deeper and more conscious awareness of the fact that we get to create our experience of life at any moment? Imagine what our lives, our careers, and our relationships would look like if we stopped blaming our experience on other people or on external circumstances. We would free up so much positive energy and take back so much of our personal power.

Here are a few things you can do to enhance your capacity to own your experience of life in an empowering way:

1) Admit where you play victim and give away your power. As is always the case, “the truth will set you free.” Take a look into your life, especially in the areas where you find the most pain, suffering, and struggle right now. Without judging yourself, can you find places where you’re acting like a victim of your current circumstances (as though it is simply “happening to you”)? The more honest and specific you can be about this, the more freedom it will provide for you.

2) Acknowledge, own, and express your underlying emotions. Whenever we go into victimhood there is something we don’t want to deal with, take responsibility for, experience, or express emotionally. Even thought it can be a little painful and scary initially, by dealing directly with the emotions we’re avoiding, we go to the source of the issue and address it at the root. Ironically, once we’re able to acknowledge, own, and express the emotion(s) involved, much of the suffering and struggling go away – but only if we’re willing to really take responsibility for it and express it fully.

3) Make a commitment to fully own your experience. Declare to yourself and others in your life that you’re willing to take 100% responsibility for your experience of life. This doesn’t mean that “stuff” won’t happen, but it does mean that you make a commitment to live your life by design, not default. It’s also likely that you’ll forget, slip up, and fall back into victimhood from time to time (or often). However, making a commitment to yourself and to others – and also asking them to hold you accountable with honesty and kindness, can create an environment (within you and around you) conducive for you to enhance your capacity to live your life with power and responsibility.

Give yourself some space and have a lot of compassion with yourself and others on this; most of us have been trained, educated, and encouraged to live in “victim consciousness” – even though it doesn’t work or give us what we want ultimately. When we’re willing to tell the truth, express our real emotions, and make a commitment to living as designers of our experience – we can literally transform our lives in miraculous ways.

(For this week's audio message, click here.)

How can you take back your power from your circumstances and remember that your experience of life is up to you? Share your thoughts, action ideas, insights, and more below.

Omega NYC: A Time for Renewal April 16–18, 2010

2010-01-27T11:18:00.001-07:00

Omega NYC offers you a chance to step out of your busy life and experience some of Omega's most popular and inspiring teachers. During the weekend, you'll gather the tools and support you need to return to your life feeling renewed and recharged.

Spend Friday evening with Byron Katie and Elizabeth Lesser. Saturday and Sunday, choose a program from six of Omega's most popular in-depth workshops featuring these extraordinary teachers:

The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari

2010-01-27T02:21:00.007-07:00

The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari:

A Fable About Fulfilling Your

Dreams & Reaching Your Destiny
By Robin Sharma

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Product Description

The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari imaginatively presents a set of simple yet profoundly effective lessons for personal growth, created by bestselling author and renowned professional speaker Robin S. Sharma, based on his own search for life's true purpose. In a tale that is both wondrous and mystical, Sharma offers practical and wise advice on how to:

- develop joyful thoughts
- follow your life's mission and calling
- look within for success
- cultivate self-discipline and act courageously
- value time as your most important commodity
- nourish your relationships
- live life fully, one day at a time

2010-01-26T10:13:00.000-07:00

Just for a moment, think about what it must be like to be fully aware—to feel that silence and stillness. Jon Kabat-Zinn says that doing so can bring profound healing and transformation to your life.

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